Sunday, December 22, 2019

Fate At It's Best!

Well, where do I begin? After struggling through an emotionally exhausting 2018 I swore to myself that 2019 was going to be a better year for me, just me and my cats, I had quite frankly given up on any thoughts of men or a relationship! I truly was so very tired and weary of it all. The latter part of 2018 I began to get my happy back. I finally realised I didn't need someone in my life to complete it, not at that particular time anyway. I needed to find me again, I somehow lost 'me' amongst the ups and downs of a relationship that wasn't working and hadn't been for a while, a relationship we both stayed in for far too long hoping it would work, it wasn't and realistically never would have done...

After getting my head on straight again and working hard on painting the boat all Summer I decided I needed a pastime. I was free to do whatever I wanted and other than working and keeping the boat in order I needed something else, another interest. On scrolling through facebook I noticed a post from a friend I had known for a long time, he was talking about how much he loved dancing and a competition he was going to enter for charity. I messaged him to ask if he recommended dancing as I was looking for a new hobby to pursue. He was really enthusiastic and encouraged me all the way to give it a go. He said I should give his dance class a go as it was great. He was due to go on holiday for two weeks so said he would contact me with details when he got back. In the meantime I spoke to another friend who also danced, she did modern jive and also encouraged me to give it a go!

I went to the jive lessons and wasn't too sure but after a couple of weeks, I loved it! As well as loving the social side of dance the exercise made me feel great and the weight started to drop off which made me feel a lot better about myself. When Alan came back from his holiday I messaged him to really thank him for encouraging me to give dance a go, we chatted on and off on messenger and decided that it would be nice to have a coffee and a catch up for old times. I guess I should mention at this stage that Al and I go way back, 45 years to be precise!

I had a school friend called Sue who later met Alan. They were really good to me and let me stay with them in their flat when I left home until I got my own place. Alan set me up on a blind date with his workmate Mick. Mick and I hit it off and we all often went out as a foursome. Sue and Alan had their first Son who I was godmother to but as often happens in life we all drifted apart and lost touch. Mick and I went on to get married and have a lovely Son and two lovely Daughters and Sue and Alan went on to have two more Sons. Mick and I sadly parted ways and very sadly Alan lost Sue some years ago, in fact, that was the last time I saw Alan at her funeral 12 years ago...until now.

Alan and I became friends on facebook but didn't really see each other on there much but it was nice that I could message him when I wanted to ask him about dance at the end of  2018. We arranged to have that coffee and it was so lovely to see him after so many years! I managed to get lost finding his place which we both laughed about as I ended up a dirt path which led to a farm and field full of cows! We had a good old chat which was all very comfortable and easy which was just as well as  I had asked Alan if he fancied coming to a dance on New year's eve, not for one minute did I think he would as I thought he would have had other plans, he said yes why not I have nothing else on so it was a relief we were ok when we met up for that coffee which was only a short while before the dance I had invited him to! I really didn't expect it to be awkward if I am honest it was fine. In fact, it was more than fine it was an eye-opener!

If I am being completely honest I felt an attraction to Alan straight away and he has since told me that he kind of felt the same when I asked him when did he first feel that attraction he said as soon as I stepped out of the car, can't even begin to say how lovely that made me feel! Once we had seen each other again after so long and I knew we got on just fine I started to really look forward to the dance on new years eve. It was a great night we danced, talked and laughed all night. It truly was a lovely night. In the coming weeks, we chatted and Alan invited me round for tea and a dance lesson which was so nice of him, nerve-racking for me as I couldn't look him in the eye as it would have been a dead give away that I was attracted to him really embarrassing as I had no clue at that stage whether he felt the same so I would have made a right prat of myself! We went on to have dance lessons together and I love it. We dance Ballroom and Latin. Alan has the patience of a saint, I am not the best at learning stuff but slowly....very slowly I am getting better but I do struggle to remember steps which is so frustrating for us both but when it goes right it feels amazing. As time went on it was increasingly obvious there was a spark between us made me so happy and scared all at the same time!

So when I said 2019 was going to be my year and a good one, I never, ever in my wildest dreams knew just how amazing it would be! Alan has changed my life. He has made me the best and happiest  Debbie I can be, he accepts me for who I am the scatty dizzy nut I can be, the over-anxious thinker that I can be the pain in the ass I can be! He is one of the most genuine, kindest, funniest people I have ever had the good fortune to meet. He has given me one of the best years of my life. he surprised me with a two-week cruise to the Norwegian fjords for my 60th birthday in June. I had the time of my life, my first cruise and it was fantastic, there wasn't one single minute in the whole two weeks I didn't enjoy it was magical. I was like an excited child when we arrived at Southampton and I first saw the cruise ship she was stunning. Alan gave me the best birthday ever he was great company and it was so apparent that we were both very much on the same page. I think the fact that we got on so well for two weeks 24/7 just proved how good we are together. I was spoilt rotten too!

I believe in fate and feel blessed that fate chose to bring us together. It feels so easy and natural. I have to say that we were both a bit shell shocked when we first became an item because hand on heart neither of us saw that coming in a million years! Our families and friends are so happy for us too which is heartwarming.

As if the cruise for my 60th wasn't enough Alan surprised me with a trip to Las Vegas and then a week in Spain, my feet haven't touched the ground and I have to say it's great. Holidays aside any time we spend is an absolute pleasure, just normal everyday things are lovely. The absolute icing on the cake is that he loves Tickety Boo, I mean really loves her. He has transformed her and she looks fantastic. She is like a brand new pin and I will never be able to express how happy that makes me to see her looking so good! He is a natural at the helm too. We are both looking forward to having fun times away on her together. Finally, I have found the captain to my ship, my best friend and soul mate and somebody who makes me feel so loved and makes me smile the biggest smile ever. I have for the first time in a long time started to look forward with excited anticipation for the future. He makes me feel safe and content not to mention he has me laughing most of the time, we seem to be on the same page with our sense of humour too. I only hope I make him as happy as he makes me!

So New years eve we again brought in together, it's special for us as we class it as our anniversary and we will always celebrate it as so! Going into 2020 with Alan and looking forward to this next year makes me a very happy girl. I never imagined I could be this happy. As I have said before we are both very much on the same page, continuing to write our book together. If the first chapter is anything to go by it is going to be a best-seller!!

I have great confidence that whatever life throws at us as a couple we will support each other and love each other through it. I have never been so sure about anything in my life...